I’m not really a Mother’s Day type of Mom. Last year was a disaster and I swore I was not going to repeat the experience again. So this year I’m skipping it. Yep. Skipping it.
My perfectionist self struggles with the idea that the day is supposed to be sunshine and rainbows from the moment I wake up until all my adorable angels lay their sweet little heads on the pillow. I really don’t know where I came up with this perfect Mother’s Day concept… Well, Yes I do… media, TV, Instagram. The usual culprits. We photographers are so great at showing the best curated bits of our lives. We carfully crop out the messes and curate our morning breakfast in the perfect morning light. Then the real and un-instagramable bits of life go unseen. I’m trying to get better myself but, it’s hard! My intellectual self knows that I’m being ridiculous and setting my expectations far too high. I’ve got 4 small children for goodness sakes. What is the matter with me!
I’ve been working on dealing with how my perfectionism negatively effects my daily life and my parenting more recently. I’ve been trying to focus on practicing ‘good enough’. But gosh, perfectionism is such a hard habit to shake. It allows me to manically clean, decorate, organize, work, edit ect. and then it paralyzes me with inaction all at the same time. If I can’t do something 100% I find that I won’t do it at all. For example, I currently have 3 baskets of clean laundry sitting in my room unfolded because I want to do a season switch with the kids clothes. Of course the weather is all wonky and not helping! But there it sits… waiting for the perfect situation for me to dive into the project. Why-Oh-Why can’t I just slowly pull the winter clothes as the weather warms?!?!
Aaannnnyway, back to Mother’s Day.
My kids don’t seem to get the yearly memo telling them to be on their best behavior. And like clock work, every year they wake up grouchy and wanting to eat just like any other regular morning. I mean really… how dare they want to eat at 6am on Mother’s Day!?! ;p Last year they were especially hideous, the fighting and whining rivaled that of all the other regular days of the year. I honestly couldn’t wait for the day to end. I felt as if, we failed at having the expected epic day that “everyone” else seems to get.
Also… and I’m sure this plays a bigger part in my lack of excitement… but, I’m always sad that I don’t get to take my own Mom out to brunch or bring her a new hanging basket. I don’t get to call her and chat about the shenanigans my kids are up to, or the disaster they left in the kitchen as they cooked me up breakfast that morning.
This year, I’m skipping the perfect Mother’s Day stuff. Instead I’m going to head to church with the full expectation that my kids will be naughty and chatty. There will be lots of fights and lots of non-sharing of toys. Oh and the whining… there will be more whining than ever. I WILL love the sweet projects the girls made in school and will cram into their backpacks for me. Bless those teachers! I’m going to do a bit of yard work and go about my day changing diapers and feeding people like it’s my job. Because it is my job, it is the best job in the whole wide world.
I love these needy, imperfect little people. I love them so much more because they put up with me and my too high expectations.
So here is to all of us who know Sunday isn’t going to be a glorious Disney movie moment. To us all who wouldn’t change the imperfect families we have for the world!
I’ve included a couple of my very favorite Not Perfect family photo’s… missed focus and all… my not perfect life is still worth documenting indeed and so is yours.
P.S. Mary gave me a card she made for her music teacher this morning(it has her teachers name on it) as my Mother’s Day gift and told me that her teacher and I could share it since she didn’t feel like making another one for me.
I’m a Madison Family Photographer and would love to hear from you and document a bit of your perfectly imperfect family.